Lies From Lying Liars

So since I'm living at home and don't really have a job right now, I'm at the mercy (and rightfully so) of whatever yard/other work that mom and dad cook up for me.  On Sunday the family project was clearing out some flower beds that are on the side of the house, including transplanting a rose bush.  

Mom clipped some of the wild outstretched rose branches and told me to take them to the street.  I closely examined the branches for a safe handhold and discovered that these rose branches (gasp) had no thorns!  "This rose bush doesn't have thorns!" I exclaimed.  "Yeah, not all of them do" replied mom rather casually.  

 This isn't really too big of a deal except that THIS:

IS A FUCKING LIE!  Shame on you Poison.